Senior Year: First Month-ish

All right, I admit. The only reason I've been blogging for three days in a row is because I'm sick and have nothing else to do. Surprisingly, TV does get boring after awhile. But here is an update on school so far (stuff I didn't mention on my other post).

First of all, I got an A- on my summer assignment!! Woot! I am so proud of myself because I worked really hard on it. I love AP Lit so much. It's my favorite class this year. Sorry, Sno-Isle. It's been a good run, but constantly working in groups is not really my thing. We can still be friends though, right? Sno-Isle?

Oh well. Today I learned that our project in Sno-Isle is due Monday, which is a huge relief. My group didn't make much progress today. In all honesty though, it's not like I'm the shining beacon of responsibility and I always get things done. Today would have been a slack-off day, especially since Snohomish leaves early. An hour early to be exact. The important thing is that we finish, and I'm fairly certain we will. Come on, though, it's only the second project of the year, I'm sure we'll get better. No, my teacher (Tory) is not the type to force us to stay in one group all year, I choose to stay with them. Why? Well, it's definitely not their work ethic. Haha. I stay with them because I would get bored rather quickly if all we did was work. When I get a real job, sarcasm will probably be scarce, so I'm savoring it while I can. If you ask them why they're staying in the group, though, I honestly have no idea what they'll say. It's not because of me, I know that. Actually, if any one of us left the group, none of us would stop them. I mean, they're a bunch of guys and that means it's all logic and no emotion. I might miss them if they leave the group, but I'm the emotion. Just ask, they'll tell you. So I think it's the whole group that makes everyone stick together. Wow, that sounds incredibly cheesy, but what other reason is there? None of them are reading this (probably) and they aren't about to stop me randomly and say "Let me tell you all the things that make this group so amazing and why we haven't abandoned you." That's my job. I constantly tell them how great they're doing. Or how not so great they're doing. I don't know why, because it's not like it helps them any. But as team leader I'd feel weird if I was "that team leader" who constantly told everyone how bad they were doing and that all the work they did wasn't good enough. But I also don't want to be "that team leader" who literally sits there silently without giving any instruction. Wait...I've actually done that. But that was because of my cold and I was incredibly exhausted. I know, I know, I'm making excuses, but I seriously don't want to do that again. I've discovered that if I'm not working, they don't progress as well, just because it is a group effort after all.

The nice thing about working with guys in this age group is that none of them start bugging me about not working unless they're teasing me. Trust me, I've heard some girls (including me) get really mad about that one person on their group who didn't do anything. Heck, I've ranted about this group to my friends. But after working with them for a little bit, I realized that none of them actually want to fail. None of them actually like seeing me flip out on them either (which I have done three or four times. Not recently though). There have been people who enjoy seeing me flip out. If these guys were like that, I would dislike them all. Me being mad is amusing (because it's so unlike me), but they aren't trying to make me mad, which I appreciate. It's not just any group after all. It's my group.

Ok, now I'm sounding to much like a mom (that happens quite often, no joke) so I'm going try not to think about the last day of senior year when it hits me I'll never see them again. I'm dreading that day. I'm not going to cry, that's a fact. First of all, I've never cried at school before (except in 4th grade when I had a really bad ear infection). Secondly, a lot of my friends are guys, and not only do none of them want to see me get emotional, but they aren't going to be emotional. Nothing. Zilch. I'm starting to see why so many romantic relationships don't work out in high school because girls don't realize that just because guys don't act as happy as the girl does in the relationship, it doesn't mean the guy doesn't care. Boys and girls are different. But I have girlish tendencies too. Somewhere in the back of my head are my emotions telling me that if a guy friend doesn't scream "I'll miss you!" on the brink of tears directly to me, then maybe he doesn't actually care. Of course that isn't true. But those are consistent thoughts that go through my head on the last day of school. "Are they going to miss me at all?" And if they say they'll miss me, that never works because they have to be all emotional about, like we're dating or something. Realistically, if one of them did do that to me, it'd be weird and awkward and I'd question our relationship throughout the year (we were just friends, right?).

Sometimes I hate being a girl that loves people so much. It takes me longer to get over things. So I'll have to force myself to not keep in contact with any of my friends (except Hayley and a couple exceptions) because if I don't the "drifting apart" will take too long, which always makes it worse. It's high school. You're supposed to make friends you'll never see again. But imagine if we were launched into a workplace right away and had never had a close friend before. We would either make the wrong ones because we don't know what we like, or isolate ourselves and be lonely the rest of our lives. I'm pathetic, I know. I've already started planning out what I want to say in other people's yearbooks. It's the first month of school.

"And here on the left, you'll see First Street, the home of our popular antique shops and shows. Wait...what's that? Oh, it's Michaela being nostalgic again. GO HOME!"

 "But...but I don't want to! I'll never see them again!"

"You graduated twenty years ago! Get off the street corner! You look ridiculous."

"I want to go back! Let me go back!"

"Oh no. Quick! Someone grab the time machine before she gets to it first!"

See, it's funny because we don't have tour guides in Snohomish. The town is much too small and boring. But I still love this town, and this state for that matter. What can I say, I'm a sucker for rain. But I'll blog about rain later. That post will be much shorter, I promise.

Wait..I just realized this was supposed to be about school. I get on the topic of Sno-Isle and it all goes haywire. Great.

"Hello. My name is Michaela...and I am nostalgic..."

"Hi Michaela..."

I should consider joining NA (Nostalgics Anonymous). There's quite a confusion because NA already stands for Not Applicable. Not many people know about it.

Anyway, I need to leave before I become a hot nostalgic mess and this blog post becomes really long.

Oh wait...

Sick Boredom

Being sick is never fun, but the thing that kills me most is all the free time. I've decided not to go to school or work tomorrow, so I have the entire day to do whatever. But, because I'm sick with this cold, everything is tedious and/or painful.

Messing around on my phone for a long time is fun for awhile, but the light makes my sinus headache worse, and I put it down. Then I may decide to sleep. Sleep only works if I'm "throw-up" sick though. Then you're sick enough to be exhausted all day. I would know. I got that virus in June and did nothing but sleep (and get up maybe once or twice) all day. I actually didn't even sleep on my bed. Getting up to go to bed was too much work.

Colds are different. After awhile my body says, "Hey, you're not tired! Get out of bed!" But as soon as I stand up I get a really bad head rush. Since my head hurts I want to sleep, but my body is stubborn. So what am I supposed to do for 18 hours? Last time I got a cold I texted all day, but I don't really text a lot anymore. I am this year, though, because there's a lot to talk about when it comes to Sno-Isle projects. I will text a little to see if my group is actually working. And our project is due tomorrow and we have a lot to do. So I need to check in on my group mates to see if they did anything. Besides, if we get a good grade on the project, I'm buying them all donuts. Or make cookies. Whichever they want. Why? Because I'm team leader! That's what we do!

Anyway, I hate the days where you literally have nothing to do because the things you would normally be able to do is too hard. Wow, I sound so lazy.

Fortunately, tomorrow's Friday. So now I'll have all weekend to recover. Also, I'm missing a quiz tomorrow. Did I plan this on purpose? Hmm?? Mwahahaha!

No, I actually did not. It just happened to be that way. However, in the back of my head I thought "I really don't want to do a quiz in this condition."

I realized that after I pushed myself through school that no one would really want to sit around me in this condition. I wouldn't. My friends jokingly leaned away from me last period, but I thought about it and decided it would be best to take a day off.

Commencing boredom!

If you have suggestions, please let me know. I'll be checking comments quite often tomorrow because I probably won't be leaving my laptop for more than a few minutes.

Tomorrow would be a good time to continue reading Frankenstein. It's quite difficult to follow, but I get the idea. I'm on Chapter four, and the name "Frankenstein" was finally revealed as being the name of the current narrator (I say "current" because technically there's two narrators, but anyway...). And it was mentioned in passing! I think I'm finally getting to the more interesting parts. It was revealed that Frankenstein knew the "secret" to animation (no, not cartoon animation. Like, bringing people to life and stuff.). But he'll never tell what it is. Ooohhhh.

Ok, bedtime. Then boredom. Yay.

Guitar Lessons: Progress Has Been Made!

My guitar and I have a complicated relationship. Sometimes I give it all the attention it needs, sometimes I leave it alone for weeks at a time. Sounds like some relationships at my high school. Speaking of school, since school started, I need something to relax every once in awhile. Don't worry, I'm getting my homework done. But I've come crawling back to my guitar. Fortunately, it accepted me back willingly. My calluses are coming back.

Oh, and I learned how to strum upward. What's that? That's right. An accomplishment. No, it's not a very big one, but I think it's pretty awesome I can play "I'm Yours" by Jason Mraz all by myself because of this newly acquired skill. And the song that I wrote a little while ago called "Beautiful Girl" sounds a lot better when I strum upwards. Wait...did I tell you I wrote a song (of course I did. Right here.)? I've written two, but one was for my friend because she needed one to put in her story. She'll probably post it at some point. She's Rugphan's Fiction. The other song I wrote, though, actually has some meaning to how I was feeling at time. I'll have to record it sometime and post it.

But alas, I still know no barre chords. I'm so disappointed because this song called "Rhythm of Love" is an amazing, and it's really easy to play. As long as you can play chord B7. B7 is a barre chord. A relatively easy one, but a barre chord nonetheless. Curse you barre chords!

I don't really share my "accomplishments" to my fellow guitar players at school, because they're way ahead of me. One of them is learning similar songs that I'm learning, and he's encouraging. But when I told him I can strum up now, he laughed as he pictured me simply strumming downward. It's not like he hurt my feelings, but I realized he didn't share my enthusiasm. The other guy already knows guitar really well, but he plays metal. He's shocked whenever I tell him I don't know a band he's really familiar with. We clearly didn't learn guitar for the same reasons. I never want to play metal. I mean, if I have the capability at some point, that's fine. But I'd rather write beautiful music that can warm people's hearts or make them cry. Now that I think about it, he took the "guy" approach to music and I took the "girl" approach. Yes, I know I'm generalizing. You don't have to remind me. I know there are girls who play metal songs, and guys that write songs like "I'm Yours."

Anyway, I'm sticking to sharing my accomplishments with my blog. Because half the people who read this don't play guitar. So I sound like a genius. The same thing happens when I speak Arabic to people. I don't know that much, but I'm better than them, so I'm awesome at it. It's all relative. I'm happy with people being impressed by my writing, Arabic, and niceness. Guitar is optional. I'm already good at other stuff, so this is just for fun. Professionalism is not what I'm aiming for. My future career will hopefully involve computers. See? That will be another thing I want to be good at and can impress people with. Why bother with guitar when I'm good at so many other things? I'm just kidding. If I have kids, I'm writing their lullabies.

On another note, school is going well. I've never laughed so much at school. Sno-Isle is always funny when I'm not stressed. AP Lit always makes me laugh. It's hilarious because my teacher will tell a joke and start laughing. Then we're laughing because of the joke and because of his laugh. His laugh is the best bit. The jokes you wouldn't really get unless you've read Crime and Punishment. So, if you have, you can contact me and I'll let you in on some of my classes jokes. And modern fiction is funny because of the people I sit next to. They make me laugh constantly, even if I don't want to. They're just the kind of people who always make me laugh without trying at all. If I tried to explain those jokes, you wouldn't laugh. Trust me. The jokes we tell are usually only funny for a day. Except for "Blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-apple juice!" See, it's funny because the song goes "Blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol!" Get it? I told you that you wouldn't laugh.

To conclude, I have my first cold of the year. So yay for that. This is the first cold I've had with glasses. Sinus pressure in your nose + Glasses resting on your nose = not good. My head throbs when I stand up, but whatever. This is probably my cold's worse day. I'm only wearing my glasses at school. There's no real reason to wear them at home. When I think about it, if I take my glasses off for whatever reason at home, I don't usually put them back on. They're a nuisance. It's so much work to pick them up, put them on, all that stuff. What am I, active? Yeah right!

That is all for today. I'm going to back to grabbing tissues, complaining, and listening to my music collection. When I don't listen to my "favorites" playlist, me listening to music usually goes like this.

"Oh! Coldplay!" *listens* "Ok, no more ColdPlay." *skip skip skip skip* "Come on! Where's Basshunter!" *skip skip skip skip skip* "There he is!" *listens* "Ok, no more Basshunter." *skip skip skip skip*

Does anybody else skip a lot of songs when they're listening to music? Or do I have to delete a lot of songs?

So long for now. Stay healthy! Colds are no fun.

What's the Deal With Eyes?

If someone compliments my eyes (which hardly happens), what exactly are they complimenting? The color, the emotion it brings them, the emotion it projects?

What makes eyes emotional anyway? I have never understood that. I am not a very good analyzer of eyes, but with that being said, I still see some emotion in them. Where does that come from? Is it in the eyes or our own mind.

Someone I know has very unique eyes, and it's not because of their color. One minute, his eyes are friendly and the next they are extremely off-putting and creepy. How does he do that?! But he is a unique person on his own. He's the type of guy that you never really know is serious or not if he tells you something really weird. You hope he's kidding, but you don't know for sure. Actually, that isn't very unique because a lot of boys in my high school are like that.

Eyes are a strange phenomena. They do wonderful things like help us see. But they also do interesting things like lie. In my opinion, eyes are the most devious part of the body. There are some eyes I've come across that are rather enjoyable to look at. Sometimes it's because of their color, but other times it's because they look so inviting. It's all very strange. I don't know how people can make their eyes look friendly when they're lying to you. They hold so much emotion behind them, and I can't comprehend how someone puts on fake eye-emotion. Most of us have acted happy when we're not, but how do you make your eyes look happy when you're not?

Clearly, I have no idea what I'm talking about because I keep asking so many questions. What do you think about eyes? Do you think about eyes? If not, I apologize for being so strange.

I'm going to go back to looking up people on FaceBook that graduated last year. Of course, I can't go to their wall, but I can see what their interests are. I've only found a couple, and I can't think of very many. This is not going well.

Oh, and school is well (but stressful) and my knee (I scraped it last week) is healing. And I haven't been playing guitar as much because I've been too busy. Thanks for asking.

Senior Year: First day

No, I'm not going to do a day by day analysis of senior year. But I think that one day I might want to look back on this and wonder what I did on the first day of senior year. So here it goes.

First of all, I strained my throat before I even got on the bus to go to Sno-Isle. I had coffee that morning, which doesn't affect me as much as it used to, but with all the excitement added to the caffeine, I was really hyper. The morning was full of hugs and story-telling. I don't think there's a single person I said hi to that I didn't hug. I was screaming so many people's names, I was so excited. Another reason I was happy was because I had switched buses. My old bus changed routes, so now I ride a much less crowded bus. There's someone I know too, so I found someone to sit next to.

Unfortunately, my Sno-Isle bus driver changed. I liked my old one, and I really wanted to know how her summer was. But that's ok. Anyway, everyone piled onto the first bus, which was crammed and really hot due to all the body heat. One of the people who make sure everyone gets to Sno-Isle told us that the second bus was on its way. Me and several other people I knew got off and all sat together on the second bus.

The bus ride was more nostalgic than anything. The conversation was mostly video-game related, and since I only play Portal 2 (and I haven't in a long time because I've been so busy) I was uninterested. I did talk a little bit though. It's unlike a caffeinated me to be quiet for two seconds.

Then we reached Sno-Isle. Ahh, Sno-Isle. My old classroom was transferred into the DigiPen class, and the DigiPen classroom was turned into the math support room. I thought it would be saddening, but it wasn't really. I have some regrets about taking Computer and Web Programming. I have nothing against the people in my class who might be reading this (all three of you), but I didn't learn anything in that class at all. It was all pointless field trips and talking about nothing. If I hadn't taken Sno-Isle at all, I probably would have learned more. Anyway, that's a whole other rant that I shouldn't get into while my former Sno-Isle classmates are reading.

One benefit of taking CWP, I guess, was the fact that I already knew someone in the class from last year. Well, I knew three in total, but the other two people were from my school, so of course I'd know them. So I sat next to the former classmate, who immediately began helping everyone. If someone turns around and asks aloud, "How do you do this?" then he will usually jump on it. Unless he's listening to music. Or talking to someone he likes better.

CSN (Computer Servers/Networking) sounds like it will be very beneficial. We took a pre-test to see how much we know. I failed miserably (35%), which is good, because I want to learn all that terminology. I'm really looking forward to it. I was the only girl in the class, but there's supposed to be two more. I hope so. Even though I enjoy talking with guys, I occasionally desire some estrogen. Sometimes I want to talk about my hair, or someone's cute outfit. I'm hoping the girls aren't complete nerds who don't care about anything girly. I'd miss talking about that eventually.

By lunchtime my throat was dry and strained, and I was really hot. My friends ate outside but everyone was kinda uncomfortable from the heat. But I discovered something. I make good pumpkin cheesecake. The two people (and me) that tried it really liked it. I wanted to share it with more people, but I think it will be hard to transfer. I'm thinking I'll made it and bring a few slices worth, and then give it to some friends. So that was a success. Now I want to open a bake shop. Ha, ha. Yeah right. Computers before cookies. And writing before w-...um...what's a dessert that starts with W? Whipped cream? Ok, writing before whipping. Wait...that doesn't sound like a reference to baking.

Let's move on. Government was fine. My teacher is one that most kids don't like, but if you get on his good side, then you'll be fine. I'm not so sure about me. This is a political class (the one I didn't want). I'm politically neutral. This might cause problems with assignments later. But I'll just bring it to his attention ASAP and hopefully I won't fail.

AP Literature and Composition was really funny, mostly because of the Alpacas in the hallway. That's right, alpacas. Don't ask. Animal science needed them for some reason. The entire hallway of E building (the newest extension to D building) smelled like a barn. The two fluffy Alpacas were literally five feet or so from my English classroom. My teacher had the door open, and when he started introducing himself, one of them would go "Mehhh." It was hilarious. The funniest part was that they kept making that noise every time my teacher finished his sentence. The Alpacas were like punctuation.

Modern Fiction was the only class with my friend Hayley (see other blog posts for references to her), but she decided to switch out after today. We read books with adult content, and she didn't feel comfortable reading a book with a child rape in it. That's ok though. I'll see her in the mornings (if her bus isn't late like it was today) and at Friday lunch. And I'll call her all the time.

And then came the assembly. The "Class of 2012" in uncovered (literally) and all the seniors scream their hearts out. That was fun too. But I still did not do the dance the cheerleaders did. But the guys in the first three rows of our section took care of that. I should have filmed it, but my phone had gum on it (don't ask about that either). Then there was the unnecessary school spirit stuff. And the principal told everyone to vote so our class wins the "Most School Spirit" award. Yeah..I'm not doing that. I will gladly scream because I am proud to be a senior. But I will not act like my school is better than everyone elses, because it isn't. That's my least favorite thing about school.

Anyway, overall I had a really good day and I'm glad to be back in school. I probably won't be saying that for long, but as of right now, I don't care.

SENIORS FTW!

Could someone please stop time? I'd like to get off.

As people ask me what grade I'm going to be in next year, I consistently tell them I'm going to be a senior. Then it just suddenly hit me that I'm going to be a senior.

Excuse me? Wasn't I just entering middle school a week ago? Wasn't I a 13-year-old who thought everything revolved around her and that she was so awesome just yesterday? Wait, wait. Slow down!! I'm in the prime in life! Adults constantly tell me to savor it because it won't last forever, and I tried. But I failed. Mostly because I thought "savoring" meant to spend endless hours on YouTube and not do homework until the morning it was due.

How am I supposed to savor life when time passes so quickly?

We've all heard this story. Every time we hear it, we might think "Yeah, you're right. I'm going to live life to the fullest and be all I can be! I'm going to learn an instrument, a foriegn language, and make more friends!" But then, of course, we have other things to think about. Everyone, even the guy with no arms and legs who gives speeches at schools, takes life for granted. No matter how often we're told not to, it's impossible to constantly think about every blessing we have. If we did that, we'd never get anything done.

So, what can we do? I say, take time to "count your blessings" every once in awhile. It's good to think about how good we have it. Try not to think about how people who are starving think we have it worse off because they talk to their families every day and appreciate life more. Try not to think about how no matter how good you are at something, there's always someone better than you. Try not to..ok, maybe this isn't the best thing to do.

Maybe we should focus on making good memories instead. Because everyone smiles sometimes, no matter the circumstances. Even emos smile, or did smile, at one point. Just, um, try not to get Alzheimer's Disease and forget it all. Wait..ok...this isn't working.

Never mind, forget it. No matter what I say, you'll complain. You'll complain a lot. You know what? I will too. I feel like it's my responsibility to complain, especially being a woman and all. This won't make time move any slower, but it's better than crying over how good I have it.

So let's do it! Let's all complain our hearts out and procrastinate like there's always a tomorrow! Time will thank us! Maybe.